by homicidalpsychojunglefury on Wed Jun 04, 2008 10:13 pm
"top ten reasons why Euro should stick to eye-balling europorn at his favourite internet cafe and not venture into neither publishing yet another 'how to pick up girls' nor annoying forum readers":
#TEN) half-baked ideas and other brilliantly undercooked methods are not a hot commodity yet (unless you consider spam as a business and retards as a customer base)
#NINE) you'd probably get thousands of $$ sueing the publishers because you found this book in the "SELF-HELP" aisle at the bookstore, which is obviously misleading, unless it's self-helping you waste your time and money that is
#EIGHT) the probability of picking up a hot chick after reading his book is lower than the chance of Euro getting struck by lightning twice in a limo while getting a BJ from anna nicole smith on her way to a MENSA annual reunion
#SEVEN) grid-enabled statistical models running on supercomputers actually proved that it is better to try to mooch a free rim-job off a model in the middle of a runway show during fashion week in Bryant Park than to be successful with *any* chick using Euro's step-by-step guide to losing the blue balls
#SIX) Sample book titles from the same publisher: "How to marry top-models and become a billionnaire in 7 easy steps - Money back guaranteed" and "The complete maps to hidden gold treasures still not found after 10 decades"
#FIVE) Euro is actually very smart and a cunning individual at that. He just wants everybody to think he's a retard on crack. Euro, you old pirate, you fooled me!!
#FOUR) bunny lost all empathy/sympathy for Euro, and he's usually very fond of helping out much worse losers than himself. Bad sign.
#THREE) enrique iglesias actually bought and read the book. before that, he was a virgin. i swear!
#TWO) "alien abductions" and "hot girls picked up by retarded losers" are actually pretty popular topics on the internet. Surely there must be some truth to it.
#ONE) "How to pick up hot girls" by Euro should be put right next to "How to have a successful marriage" by OJ Simpson.
>:-[